To Adam
Lie there in innocence, my little first-born,
Care not a jot about why you exist.
Eyes are unfocused,
Hands clench so awkwardly,
Feet kick so randomly, thoughts in a mist.
But just a few moments ago, just what happened?
You looked at me directly, saw deep inside.
Followed my movements, understood everything,
Full recognition. Miraculous pride.
Now you are restless, dismayed without reason,
Your sweet, new-born features contorted, then calm.
Emotion has vanished,
Intelligence absent,
Just chaos and confusion, searching for balm.
But where is the knowing you showed only recently?
Where is the focus you brought from the womb?
Why has this vacant expression replaced
The all-seeing, omniscient dispeller of doom?
So you are here, and fully on board.
Your life is beginning, we’ve started the clock.
Childhood is pressing,
Your mother’s breast nearing,
Replacing the trauma, absorbing the shock.
Oh where did you go to, the strange godlike being
That greeted your daddy just moments from birth?
Perhaps you are marking time, learning from living
Until you return like us all, back to earth.
April 11, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Its beautiful dad, thank you.
Although Mandy says, knowing me as she does, that the expression of concentration was probably wind!
xx
April 11, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Not possible. You had already fated three times before they put you in the crib.
April 11, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Sorry - the word was “farted”
April 15, 2008 at 9:47 pm
Tony, this is a beautiful rendition of your feelings about the baby Adam.
Adam, your were a little older than this when I first met you and the baby Rachael. These are the feelings that I clearly remember your Daddy having about you, his very special first child. Throughout my many years of friendship with your father that which I have found to be most beautiful has been his genuine and honest passion for all of you, his children.
And I have been privileged to know you all. God bless you.
love and hugs. xx